Still With You

For you created my inmost being; you knit me together in my mother's womb. I praise you because I am fearfully and wonderfully made; your works are wonderful, I know that full well. My frame was not hidden from you when I was made in the secret place. When I was woven together in the depths of the earth, your eyes saw my unformed body. All the days you have ordained for me were written in your book before one of them came to be. How precious to me are your thoughts, O God! How vast is the sum of them! Were I to count them, they would outnumber the grains of sand. When I awake, I am still with you. (Psalms 139:13-18)

Is it still faith if I am not sure I am following? If I am just going this way because it's the way I'm in? Is it still faith if there is no promise? No promise, yet I cling to You, Father of my heart. No direction, yet I trust You to order my steps. I walk blind, and I trust You to turn me around if I have been mistaken. I am afraid, maybe more afraid of my own failure and foggy-thinking than I am of anything You might give me. I am not holding to what You have told me; I am just holding to You...You who know me fully and love me deeply. 

Let me know You. Give me the creativity and the strength and the courage and the blood-red love to let You so imprint Yourself on me that I will be able to communicate You to hearts full of wilderness. I am thankful that You have not asked me for words, because I don't have them. I don't really even know what to ask for...but You have read my heart. I am not even sure of myself, but You are. 

In your time, come to me with Your Grace, Lord Jesus. I am waiting for You here.